Get all 8 The Invisible Teal (aka Todd Hoover) releases available on Bandcamp and save 40%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Amygdala, Debt and Quandaries, A Bottle of Wine, The Whole Spirit: Redemption Songs, Thoughts from a Foxhole, Todd Hoover & the Invisible Teal, One Day at a Time and No Alternatives, and Happy Accidents EP.
1. |
Eulogy
06:44
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You always brought such light into my life,
even though you only brought it once or twice.
You were such a bright and beautiful flame,
tragically blown out before its time.
And I'm trying my best not to cry,
'cause there are many other candles in my life,
but hopefully, I'll still be able to see
with only the memory of your light,
shining as if it were still alive ...
(c) 2011 Made to Make Music
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2. |
Imagined Empty Space
06:22
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I remember that first night I put my arm around your shoulder;
I immediately thought that God intended us to be together.
But just because God intends things to happen
doesn't mean He intends them to last.
Well, I promised myself I wouldn't raise my expectations.
But that's exactly what I did, and without even words of confirmation,
I treated you like a trophy,
and that's an awful feeling for the both of us.
I did what you said and took my arm off of your shoulder.
Now every time I hear my name or see my face in the mirror,
I want to disappear.
One pull of a trigger should do the trick ...
but I'm not going to do that to you
(or anybody else, for that matter),
because despite all these excuses that I make,
the truth is that I really matter.
And so I'm not going to waste my time contemplating over
the imagined empty space of what could have never been.
And yeah, it hurt to know that I didn't gain a lover,
but it hurt much more to know I lost a friend.
No, I'm not going to waste my time contemplating over
the imagined empty space of what could have never been.
And I can let it go that I didn't gain a lover
if you let me know that I haven't lost a friend.
(C) 2011 Made to Make Music
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3. |
Stay
04:29
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Every time I mention His Name,
they just lean away or try to change the subject on me.
And every time that Sunday comes around,
they ask me about my morning in a tone so condescending.
And every time they see the cross around my neck,
they look at it as if it's the symbol for some evil cult of killers --
as if I was a sinner for wearing it.
And all of this backlash that I get makes me feel ...
it makes me feel nothing,
'cause I know better: I know You're here with me.
And no matter what they say,
You're the One I'll always stay with no matter what.
(C) 2011 Made to Make Music
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4. |
Thank You
05:08
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So I finally told the truth and said I'd liked you for a while.
I fell in love with your beautiful spirit, voice, heart, eyes, and smile.
But your answer to my question proved all of my heart's blindness.
Yeah, your answer let me know you were not meant to be mine ...
and that's perfectly alright.
But your light is still so bright -- a candle in my darkness --
although all those feelings that I had have more or less subsided.
So thank you for your understanding and for your continued kindness,
'cause I don't know just what I'd do without your light in my life.
Don't take your light away.
You ought to know that I still love you, but this time under Christ.
(C) 2011 Made to Make Music
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5. |
Sitting
02:37
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Sitting, listening to the sound of people talking;
it seems so stimulating juxtaposed to silence.
Sitting, feeling like I'm floating weightless
and I'm waiting for someone to pull me down.
Sitting, desperately fighting off the monsters
circling my head, trying to atrophy my brain.
Sitting, dreaming of the highest pinnacles
that I'll never be tall enough to reach.
Sitting, wondering about why
every day's a replica of the one before.
Sitting -- all around me, nothing's happening
and it doesn't look like anything will change.
(C) 2011 Made to Make Music
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6. |
Travis Morrison
07:14
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Travis Morrison, I've got the jitters like you wouldn't believe.
I feel like I've lost my faith in E, Joel Saltzman, and cognitive restructuring.
I almost wish I was still a child; I want to go back to that simple life,
'cause when I hear the ice cream truck go by, it makes me cry.
I think about all the killers who are waiting on death row,
and I wish they'd just had somebody to talk to.
And I think about whether or not I'm an heir to Elliott Smith's throne
or just another whiny Chris Carrabba.
And I think about the angels in my life
and why they've flown so far away from here --
to Tucson or to Flagstaff or to Florida or to Oregon or to Africa.
Don't they know I need them all to stay right here with me?
Travis Morrison, I've got the jitters like you wouldn't believe,
but at least I know that you will never abandon me.
Yeah, right now, you're the only one I need,
'cause I know exactly what you're gonna say
when I press play and you begin to sing to me ...
but somehow it doesn't satisfy.
It's been a while, and it's begun to lose its life.
And I've spent so much time just listening to the same old words
and all I really want to do is talk now.
So maybe I should turn to something else --
I'm sure I could find some other form of help.
So I will pick up that phone and I will dial every number
'cause far beyond those missing angels and far beyond this album,
there's still plenty of people who'd be willing and able to help.
Yes, I will pick up that phone and I will dial every number
and talk to every single angel that I know;
because, Travis Morrison, you let me know I've got the jitters (thanks),
but you can't do a thing to shake them off.
And right now, all I want to do is talk.
(C) 2011 Made to Make Music
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7. |
Burning Without Dying
10:50
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The only thing worse than burning to death
is burning without dying,
and that seems to be what every single person in the world
is doing right now.
They all combine to form one massive flame;
an inferno that's been burning
ever since the snake got its way
and that first bite was taken.
And I watch people try to fight the fire with fire,
but all they end up doing is making the flame larger.
And none of them see that we all carry water --
enough water to douse the fire forever!
But some don't know they have it, and others don't know how to use it,
and some know both, but just don't want to bother.
I wish I could change the world.
I wish I could douse the fire forever.
And I want to scream so loud.
I want to get you all to listen.
But my voice isn't loud enough, and my will isn't strong enough,
and so I guess we'll just keep burning on until the day that he comes.
But I'm still going to try to diminish the fire
before it scorches this whole world over.
And if I only end up dousing one flame out of thousands,
at least I'll have left this world with a slightly smaller fire than before ...
because the only thing worse than burning to death
is burning without dying.
(C) 2011 Made to Make Music
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8. |
Mr. Rogers
04:56
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I thought I knew just what You were:
Nothing but a creation,
the result of all society's
collective imagination.
I thought I was enlightened,
but inside I was so insecure.
But now I've found security
in knowing that there'll always be
Someone more enlightened than me.
Well, You're not some big and bearded guy
watching over us from the clouds.
No, You're the feeling that we get
after receiving a hundred hugs.
You're not the self-righteous jerk
that Channel 21 presents You to be.
No, You're Mr. Rogers, simply asking me,
"Would you, could you, won't you be my neighbor?"
Well, I spent so many years
singing and playing Your songs in a band,
but for the first time in my life,
the words are starting to make some sense.
And You're nothing but a feeling
(at least from what I've comprehended),
and there's nothing wrong with that
if it helps people out in the end.
You're a light guiding us all together
so we'll save each other from ourselves.
Without us, You are nothing;
and without You, we're just as well.
You're a light shining so brightly,
letting us know we're never by ourselves.
Without us, You are nothing;
and without You, we're just as well.
(C) 2011 Made to Make Music
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9. |
In Memory of Mr. Smith
03:11
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Goodbye.
I hope that you're in a better place now.
I hope you're feeling better than you did at the time that you left us.
I had a faint premonition that something like this might happen --
when you became transparent, that you might take one extra step.
And then you did, and completely disappeared.
Well, I never got to meet you in person,
and I never got to see you play.
And I only had two of your albums,
but that was enough for me.
'Cause though I never got to meet you in person,
I got to know you through the songs that you sang.
And your words became a part of my life,
and now I just feel like I've lost a very good friend.
Goodbye.
I hope that you're in a better place now.
I hope you're feeling better than you did at the time that you left.
(C) 2011 Made to Make Music
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10. |
Open
03:48
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I was lost in my impatience,
but two wrongs never make a right.
So I'll stop and change myself again ...
if You'll help me.
Are You still here?
Looking back, I know that You'll be there
with open arms and open ears,
so I can admit:
"I forgot who I gave myself to --
it was You."
So much stress over imperfections.
So much anger with so little reason.
But that's just fine -- I know that I will endure through this
if You'll help me.
Are You still here?
Looking back, I know that You'll be there
with open arms and open ears.
I've just got to admit:
I forgot who I gave myself to.
It was You.
(C) 2009 Made to Make Music
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11. |
The Door to Happiness
07:05
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Well, I'm still the socially clueless kid I was in high school.
That kid will never die -- he'll always be somewhere inside.
But just because I'm aware that he's there
doesn't mean I have to pay attention.
No, I'm not going to let him rule my actions.
Whenever I detected any sign of any danger,
I'd retreat within myself (a convenient sort of refuge).
But just because my world feels like it's crumbling
doesn't mean it really is.
And so I've learned to stop searching for signs --
symbolism is for stories and not life.
I tried so hard, so long to open the door by myself,
but I could never find the key
until somebody caught me off guard and saw me smile.
Then suddenly, the door burst open,
and the person who saw me was just one of many
waiting on the other side.
Well, I should stop apologizing for my words and my existence,
'cause I know now that they enjoy my presence
as much as I enjoy theirs.
And I should just keep this door open to anyone who wants in.
Yeah, I will just keep this door open -- I will never lock it again!
'Cause I'm not doing anyone a favor
or being a more dedicated artist.
These people are my happiness.
These people fill up my blank pages.
You people fill up my blank pages,
and I want to thank you for filling them up with something good.
(C) 2011 Made to Make Music
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12. |
Brian
04:20
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(instrumental)
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13. |
Louder
08:07
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Sometimes the tension is unbearable;
one touch, and I could snap in half.
The incessant loud noises frighten me,
and they won't stop until I'm deaf.
It keeps getting louder and louder.
So many people crowded in this room;
they've all commenced to break my back.
And it's their fault the walls are closing in
around my brittle bones and tender flesh.
And it's getting louder and louder ...
send them away.
(C) 2011 Made to Make Music
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The Invisible Teal (aka Todd Hoover) Phoenix, Arizona
Creatively written and arranged art pop from the heart and loins.
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